If they attacked me with even more enthusiasm, then I'd run away and publically make a fool of myself to make them lose interest.

If you'd publically make a fool of yourself no more chicks would dig you.

If no more chicks digged me then at least I'd have some privacy.

If you to stoped posting, it would make the world a better place!

If we'd stop posting it would ruin our fun.
And if you'd at least have some privacy then one alst remaining groupy will keep stalking you.

:((((((((((((((((

Would you mind taking it to another topic, you two?

I think Merlin interrupted the flow and stopped us from posting further

I shall continue! If one final groupie continued to stalk me, then she better be hot.

But no she isn't hot, she looks like the photograph Gabriel once had in his signature while asking everyone for a signature.

If she looked like that, I'd discreetly kill her.

If you'd discreetly kill her, the body would be found, they'd do DNA tests on the body/on the bullet/on whatever and it would be clear that you killed her and you would be arrested.

If I was arrested, I'd hire the best lawyer in the land to prove that it was justified.

If it was justified then you would be in the newspaper once again for general imrpovement in the human race.

If I was in the newspaper again then I'd learn from my last mistake and make a half-silly face, so that people will neither like nor hate me.

If you had actually learned from your mistakes that would mean that reincarnation actually does happen which will increase the suicide rate overnight since people want to be something else.

If the suicide rate is increased overnight, then there would be fewer potential mothers, and insufficient numbers to cope with the influx of new souls wanting a body.

And then the ghosts would get furious after which they return to their former bodies and then the whole world is infested with zombies.

If the whole world was infested with zombies, then priesthood would get a huge surge of new interest.

If priesthood got a suden surge of interest, the birth rate would decline since priests aren't allowed to marry/make love/anything else which is birth related not counting birthdays.

If the birth rate declined, then resurrection rate would decline too, and the zombies would triple in number. Eventually the bodies of dead priests would be possessed too, and it would be one long hopeless battle between zombies and priests.

And that would cause a declining of our current culture, which would turn us into stark raving mad barbarians we can only think abut fighting.

If we turned into start raving barbarians who are only interested in fighting, then HOPEFULLY we'd have the sense to use two swords at once rather than spinning around like idiots with big hammers.

If we'd have the sense to use two swords at once we'd be constantly under influence of frenzy.

If we were constantly under the influence of Frenzy, then the zombies wouldn't stand a chance.

If the zombies wouldn't stand a chance then we could chop all the zombies into pieces and start working on revuilding civilisation.

It we chopped all the zombies into pieces then the pieces would decay and from the Earth would spring huge quantities of vegetation, so that mankind could once more return to its forest-based roots.

And then instead of how we live now on the ground people wuld start living in trees and swinging from branch to branch except a few who just miss and swing from branch again tree.

And we would grow tails and become monkeys.

Until after yet another 1000 years of evolving the monkey's will slowl loose their tales and become relatively hairless.

They would begin to chop down the trees, and harnest power from burning them. Civilisation would spring up once again.

After a while the race that evolved from the monkeys, wuld have a strange thing referred to as "Internet" where they have "forums" for communication where people post a lot of things like philosophising about what might happen in the future.

If that happened, then oppressive moderators would threaten to remove their essential predictions.

And people would complain about their predictions being useless.

And then their predictions would come true, and everybody would formally apologise to the two prophets.

And the two prophets would come into a strange papery object which contains news.

Upon examining the paper, the prophets would find strange mimicrys of their appearances. And verily, both would be pulling stupid faces therein.

Thus people would once again laugh at the prophets.

So, enraged by the incessant laughing, the prophets would train an army of gnats to attack their detractors.

(Erm.. Gnats interesting.)
And the detractors would be so afraid of that action that they would call the asylum and that the two prophets would be shut in because they were clearly insane.