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View Full Version : THE review.


MalakSylv
09-01-2002, 06:32 PM
Not A review. This is THE review. It will surpass all those other pieces of crap that some of you have been posting.

I missed my bus so I've got an hour to burn. Here's MY Valikorlia review. ;)

Creativity: 3/10

Now, back in the day, alikorlia was arguably perhaps the most creative server ever. It was, after all, the first playerworld ever; under the name of Kharlia. People loved it because it was a breath of fresh air away from normal Graal. PKing was frowned upon, and those who liked RP (i.e: me) could come on there and do some RPing with other people. It also had cool magic, which normal Graal didn't have, so that was always fun.

However, as time progressed, many of you know that Val changed a lot. It went through numerous different owners, myself included, and saw some good times, great times, and awful times. I think each owner, especially myself, had to put up with a lot of ufortunate stress to fix the server, which had taken a liking to breaking, and then magically fixing itself again after we spend countless hours trying to find out what's wrong.

Anyway, this review is about CURRENT Val. Unfortunately, the Creativity score, which quite possibly started at 10, has dropped to a 3. It's not the most unoriginal; there are far worse playerworlds out there. But, it definitely isn't very creative anymore. There are many servers using the whole exp system thing that Val first accomplished, and the other servers usually don't have terribily bugged ones. The RolePlaying they have now makes me want to gouge my eyes out and give them to the Pope to use as marbles (because he's lost his. HAHAH GET IT?! LOST HIS MARBLES?!?!doiasuhd). I won't delve into how bad the RP is, as most of you know what it's like. Let me just say, that Val has lost the gift of RP. It was once amazing; and sometimes, even, you'll see it for a few seconds start to transform back into the old RP way, which is cool. Seconds later, though, it leaps back to the terrible grammar, godlike power abusing mess I like to call "ValsucksattehRP" RPing.

Onward we go.

Storyline: 5/10

Most of you who played Val a lot in the past; and I'm talkin' way in the past, will know that Val has never really had a proper storyline. It's always just been a world with fun magic NPCs and some RPing. And that's why it was so good. There was no crappy storyline, making each player some GUY who has to save the world from evil by completing bunch of shitty quests. And, on the way, they meet other people with the EXACT same quest; and technically, the exact same gene pool. They're the same person. So, from then on marriages become incestual ones, and wars become family fueds.

Even as Val continued to get older, they left out a storyline. Instead of giving it one, they simply used the history of the PLAYERS to make the storyline. New players would come on, and in a RP, could very easily find out a lot of old history; anything from the first Dragoon of Valikorlia, to how the Dragoons ended up as near to nothing, and the many Kings of the land, whatever. It's cool to learn about that sort of stuff. It gets you interested. Some people become inspired, and want to make RP events dealing with specific moments in history. Things like this are what make Valikorlia's "storyline" cool.

This is why, I believe, they have SO many players. Young people (which you all know is what Graal majorly consists of), which bright imaginations and a thirst for this sort of "history", connect to Val, and are greeted with a bombardment of RPers talking about the olden days of Val. They learn more and more, and then they become hooked.

Unfortunately, they also are greeted by bombardments of spelling errors and vicious amounts of DragonballZ-like RolePlaying; in which everyone seems to be able to do whatever the **** they want, however many times they want, and to whoever or what they want. Suddenly, a gate can be broken, even when it's still just sitting there idely on your screen! AMAZING!

Onward young stallion!

Graphics and Levels: 1/10

I'll be brief. After walking around Val for about an hour, my friend Wyand and I (Wyand's account names: Zakur and Zolrieg) found that almost every single level had a tile error in it. And we're not talking one insignifigant little one. We're talking LOTS OF THEM. Personally, I don't usually care; I'm not a LAT, never have been, never will be. Thus, I don't pay attention to levels. But when they leap out of me and TRY TO TAKE CONTROL OF M|Y MIND then I get upset.

As far as the graphics; I've yet to see anything decent drawn by them. They're still using Kaddar's slimer graphics (he doesn't work or play there anymore) for the Slimers, his Snow Pup graphics for the Snow Pups, and other graphics that have been the same ones since back from when I was a newbie on there. Oh, and they also seem to love teling graphics from elsewhere; I.e: Zelda (those squirrels I took a screenshot of for you all), and Providence (they took one of our bodies, and according to them so did "all the other servers". Strangely enough, they'e yet to be able to list which other servers have, and I've yet to be able to find which other servers have. Hmmm..).

I want to commit suicide.

Ganis: 1/10

Once again, I'll be brief. Never in the time I've spent playing Graal have I seen so many horribily done "original" ganis. I'm talking ganis that are either too fast, too damn slow, or don't make any damn sense; or all of the above! They seem to love making the most screwed up, unbalanced, unoriginal pieces of crap ever. I don't even want to continue writing this paragraph for fear I might headbutt my dog in the face so hard we both scream.

Die, evil ganis, die.

Scripts: 1/10

I'm not much of a scripter myself, but Jesus tap dancing Christ, these scripts make me feel dizzy. First, their system. Bugged to hell, typoed to hell, and STUPID TO HELL. It makes no sense, it's cheap, and it doesn't even WORK RIGHT. Not to mention the way you "level up" consists of hitting SPAR DUMBIES that don't fight back. 60 hits = 10 exp or something. WOW! QUALITY MMORPG EXPERIENCE HENTAI TENTACLE BLAST .. sorry.

Their other scripts consist of some terribly cheap magic, such as one that contains Tyne's graphics for, which seems to usually kill everyone it touches in one it. Some laggy as hell fireballs that also tend to kill people quite thoroughly, especially since they cant usually see them before they're three millimeters away from them, and some other retarded crap.

Oh, and they also stole Tyne's script from Providence, that fades the name of the area you're in, in and out, giving it a cool old school RP touch.

Too bad they ****ed up on the positioning on it, though. La de da.

________


Well, that's the review. Enjoy.

Oh, and here's one last finishing touch of glory to make you all laugh:

I connected yesterday to witness that I was standing next to a shop called "Hat Shop", which inside contained ONE hat (the samurai hat), selling for the CHEAP CHEAP EVERYTHING MUST GO BLOW OUT proce of 450 gralat. I was tempted to buy it, but instead I just used the HAT CHANGING NPC THAT I STARTED WITH WHEN I FIRST CONNECTED TO THE GAME, WHICH LETS ME SET ANY HAT I WANT.

I can see the logic bursting out and entering my BRAIN.

Peace out.

Chaos0838
09-01-2002, 08:18 PM
Got it in a nutshell. Apart from the typos it's a good review.

My minute or so on Valikorlia:
I log on, select my class, nation, etc. I walk up to the warp that says "Entrance to Val's main town" Oh, it's broken, *logs off*.

thesmoothcriminal
09-01-2002, 08:30 PM
i disagree with your rating for hte storyline, if it allows players to make it then it is way to under promoted or no one wants to share it

MalakSylv
09-01-2002, 08:47 PM
Originally posted by Chaos0838
Got it in a nutshell. Apart from the typos it's a good review.

My minute or so on Valikorlia:
I log on, select my class, nation, etc. I walk up to the warp that says "Entrance to Val's main town" Oh, it's broken, *logs off*.

I usually go back and fix typos, but I didn't feel like it. And I don't see how a typo in a review makes it slightly worse. That's stupid.

Originally posted by thesmoothcriminal
i disagree with your rating for hte storyline, if it allows players to make it then it is way to under promoted or no one wants to share it

It's how it used to be, and I've rated it on how it's progressed. I'd've given the storyline a 10 if it had stayed the same as it was back in the day.

Spark910
09-01-2002, 08:52 PM
I agree with it,

My 6mins of fun on Val:

1.)Log On
2.)Set up character and stuff
3.)Choose one of 2 doors
4.)Im banned for Spark911 as name

This was a while back, Im unbanned now, but Either way, I dont play it so not bothered.

Zakur
09-02-2002, 01:30 AM
http://provload.tripod.com/index4.html

I posted that in another thread, but i'll post it here as well. It's some of the many things that I experienced on Valikorlia.

Mustang1988
09-02-2002, 01:31 AM
Originally posted by Spark910
I agree with it,

My 6mins of fun on Val:

1.)Log On
2.)Set up character and stuff
3.)Choose one of 2 doors
4.)Im banned for Spark911 as name

This was a while back, Im unbanned now, but Either way, I dont play it so not bothered.

WarrLord on Val banned me for a couple hours because this guy attacked me, and I killed him.. So I PKed him, I guess. And the guy reported me to WarrLord. o.O

Torankusu
09-02-2002, 01:48 AM
excellent.

Echos
09-02-2002, 04:13 AM
Critics agree: Valikorlia is for jackasses, Providence is for gods.

Loriel
09-02-2002, 05:34 AM
Pretty good review, I agree with you very much :)
When Kharlia first went up, I liked it pretty much, even though the levels were of poor quality and the scripts barely worked - it was very creative, with wonderful integrity and atmosphere.
(Eventually I applied as LAT and increased some of the quality ;))

I quietly supported the new Valikorlia getting up, but was pretty disappointed when it finally passed. :(